BXBX NOVEL Chapter 127 - Calum's Heart
~ [Music Recommendation: "The Heart\'s Tale" by BigRicePiano (Instrumental only) - available in Youtube] ~ Please listen to it in loop while you read this part to experience the utmost beauty of this scene ~
Seconds turned to minutes, and minutes to an hour. Over and over, King Calum kissed Azalea with no signs of stopping. They were now sitting on the bed, with Azalea\'s back leaning on the headboard, and King Calum, pinning her in that position. The king\'s hands cupped Azalea\'s face while she held his chest and neck in return. When short of breath, their lips would part for a moment, enough to feel each other\'s breath.
"C-Calum," Azalea embarrassingly whispered the king\'s name. "You\'ve been kissing me for an hour now. I think my lips will be gone any moment soon".
"I\'m still not satisfied though," King Calum replied, as he pursed his lips disapprovingly.
"So how long are you planning on kissing me?"
"Hmm … maybe until I fall asleep?"
"But you\'re supposed to answer my question".
"Oh, right," King Calum clicked his tongue. "Well, the punishment I gave is for her to marry the oldest tribe head and produce a child with him. Since she coveted being a queen so much and insulted you of being nothing but a tool for childbirth".
Azalea gasped. "T-that\'s awful … how old is the oldest tribe head?"
King Calum smirked, "He should be around 50 or so. Great punishment for someone as prideful as her if I say so myself".
"Hmmm … I\'m not so sure how to feel about this," Azalea lowered her eyes. "I\'m a woman, too, so somehow, I feel sorry for her. Having the need to marry someone you don\'t like, and being forced to … consummate. Somehow -"
"- Like what happened to you," the king finished it for her. "Like how I forced you to marry me, and how you get pestered daily by the nobles to produce an heir".
Azalea looked up towards the king again. "T-that\'s not -"
"- Do you still loathe marrying me?" King Calum asked. His tone was no longer friendly or teasing, but serious instead. "Do you still regret -"
Azalea kissed the king to hush him. King Calum furrowed and bit his own lips, rejecting her kiss. Noticing she was rejected, Azalea sighed.
"It\'s true that you forced me to marry you. But I don\'t loathe it," Azalea assured the king. "To be honest … I - ," she hesitated, "I … I admired you! Since the very beginning". Her face flushed red from her confession. "That day, you agreed to free tens of thousands of my kind … I honestly thought, maybe, Magi are not that bad after all. That maybe, there\'s hope for us, and whatever the reason you conquered our planet, we, humans, probably have something to do with it, too".
King Calum\'s eyes enlarged. He did not expect Azalea to say such things. He found himself unconsciously staring at her.
"I\'ve always seen you as someone just … and very kind," Azalea continued. "You do things differently, though. I mentioned it before, that sometimes you\'re warm, and sometimes you\'re cold. I think now that I\'ve spent more time with you, I finally figured out why. And it\'s because … you\'re trying to push people away from you". Her passionate eyes fixed itself on the king\'s eyes, giving him a piercing gaze. "It\'s as if ... you\'re putting a barrier to yourself so that you don\'t get emotionally attached to anyone".
The king felt his heart sting, hearing the words she was saying.
"You\'re ... wrong," King Calum mumbled.
Azalea shook her head and pressed on, "You also try to act harsh but deep inside, you\'re concerned. You\'re helping in your own different way. Like that time that you warned me about kindness. And that time when we were in the garden after the first test. You deliberately annoyed me so I won\'t stay naive and so that I would regain my fiery spirit. And also at that time when you attempted to force yourself on me … you hesitated and stopped". Then, in a louder voice, she said, "Because deep inside, you\'re a really kind person! It\'s just that … I don\'t know but maybe, the situations happening around you … simply pushed you to do the things you didn\'t even want to".
"No, that\'s not true," King Calum disagreed. "I\'m a wretched person. Don\'t mistake my cruelty for kindness. I am cruel, that\'s just it. Don\'t try to read me as if you know me. Those are just delusions".
"Calum," Azalea called him endearingly, "tell me … why do you push people away from your heart?"
King Calum was taken aback by her question. His eyes that were gazing at Azalea a few moments ago, fell down, as he contemplated on what to say.
"Please, answer me honestly. Don\'t try to push me away," Azalea pleaded as she held the king\'s hands. "I told you didn\'t I? That I want to change your so-called \'wretchedness\' into something better? I know now why I wanted to do it so badly".
Azalea lifted the king\'s face so that his eyes looked unto hers.
"It\'s because … I," she blushed again, and smiled sweetly, "I\'m in love with you."
The king\'s eyes widened once again. His face lit up like a child who\'d been wanting to hear those words for a long time.
For a split second, he was about to smile ...
But then he remembered it again …
The death of his father …
The death of his mother …
The death of the whole royal family …
And the death of Rania ...
So he bit his lips and shut his mouth. Gritting his teeth, he felt his heart ache once more. His lit up expression changed to downcast in an instant.
"Don\'t love me," King Calum replied. "I am cursed. You\'ve seen it yourself".
"Yes, I remember your curse. But I don\'t see why I should stop loving you because of a curse. Whatever it is, I\'m sure there\'s a way to break it".
"You don\'t understand," his voice now furious, "You can\'t love me … and I can\'t love you back!"
"Why?" Azalea exclaimed. "You\'re doing it again, pushing me away from you. I won\'t listen until you tell me why!"
The air got filled with their heavy breathings.
With a miserable expression, the king answered, "It\'s because ... everyone I love … always ends up dying".
Alas, tears fell from the king\'s eyes.
"So please … don\'t love me. I don\'t want to lose you, too".
Azalea gasped and covered her mouth. Rivers of tears also fell from her eyes. She quickly embraced the king in her arms.
No words were spoken for a moment as they both sobbed silently. The silence was only broken when the king spoke again.
"This morning," the king continued, "Clavis reprimanded me. He told me to keep believing in the Supreme and that there is hope. But I told him that I don\'t believe in the Supreme anymore. And that I don\'t believe in visions, or dreams, and its interpretation. He got angry of course … but he can\'t really blame me ...
The Supreme … I used to believe in Him with all my heart, too. But after everything that happened to me, and all my sufferings … If He really was there, then why? Why did He not help me? Why did He turn a blind eye to my afflictions?
Did He not hear me cry as a child and listened to my prayers? Did I not call out to Him and believe in Him too? But why was it that I never got His answers? Did the Supreme hate me? If He did, at least tell me what I did wrong!
But He never answered me … not once".
Azalea wiped her tears. She figured that this shouldn\'t be the time for her tears. Calum needed her, and she had to be strong for him. She held his hands again and smiled warmly at him.
"I\'m sure the Supreme heard you when you called out to Him," Azalea replied. "It\'s not that He turned a blind eye. I\'m sure He\'s doing something in the background - things we\'re not seeing but are happening. We just need to wait patiently".
"And how can you be so sure about that?"
"That\'s what faith is, right? To believe in things we don\'t see. To hope on things we\'re not sure of. If you just believe in things you see … then isn\'t that called \'seeing\', instead of \'believing\'?"
The king gaped in awe of what she just said. He contemplated on his faith for a moment and began to realize in his mind, "She\'s right - absolutely right. All this time … my faith in Him was no faith at all. Always wanting proof, always wanting immediate resolution ... In that case, if I truly believe in Him this time, will everything I hoped for … finally happen?"
With a new perspective of faith, the king fell asleep with his queen on his side.
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Hi Beloved Readers!
As you may have noticed, I changed the book cover again XD. Don\'t worry this is the last time. My last two covers were artworks I got from the internet and I\'ll get sued if I continue using them. XD
Good news though, I, finally, was able to commission a great artist @cyuuri29, you can follow her in Instagram. <3
So, what do you think of the new cover? Let me know your thoughts in the comment section below! <3