妻子的欲望

Karenina was not prepared to hear the word \'sorry\' from the king.

What did he actually mean? He said he wanted the child and was willing to raise him but he still refused to marry the mother?

Her face was blank for a moment and then her expression was slowly changed with confusion. She looked at Nicholas and asked him to repeat what he said. "Sorry? What do you mean, Your Majesty?"

"I am sorry I cannot grant your request," Nicholas said calmly. "I will give you so much wealth that you can live without care for the rest of your life. I will also ensure your well-being. I will take the child and raise him, but I will not marry you."

Finally, after five years of avoiding this subject, today, Nicholas decided to end it once and for all. In the past, he had hoped that Karenina would take the hint and leave. However, she was too stubborn, or shameless.. he didn\'t exactly know what the right word to use for her situation.

Perhaps, she was just a foolish lovesick woman who kept hoping that the man she loved would finally had a change of heart and love her back, which obviously didn\'t happen.

Nicholas felt pity for Karenina if he openly ended their engagement because she would not be able to marry another man. No man would want to marry a woman who was previously engaged to a king, unless that man was also a man from his level.

That was one of the reasons why he didn\'t end it right away with Karenina. He thought she would finally give up and become tired of waiting for him. However, that didn\'t happen, and perhaps... she even tried to sleep with the king as the last ditch effort to make Nicholas marry her.

Nicholas regretted his indecision that had resulted in this mess. Now, he realized that as a king, and as a man, he had to be assertive. He had to be clear with what he wanted and stick to his decision. Otherwise, other people would keep trying to push him to do things that he didn\'t like doing.

He had decided to be firm with Karenina, and after this, he would also talk to his mother and made his decision known.

He knew his mother wanted grandchildren and was thinking about the future of this kingdom. He would tell her that he had confirmed Luciel and Jan were truly his sons. She seemed to like the boys a lot. She would be happy to know they were really her grandchildren.

"Y-your Majesty...." Karenina\'s lips trembled as she uttered her next words. Her expression was filled with disappointment. "How could you do this to me...? To your child?"

Nicholas in present was no longer Nicholas from the past who was thinking of other people\'s feelings and wants over his.

He was not in love with Karenina, and nothing in this world could make him bind himself to that woman.

"Karenina, I will be honest with you. This is something that I should have done much earlier," he said, looking at Karenina deeply. "I will not marry you. Even if we might be sleeping together on that night, the truth is, I don\'t love you. I don\'t want to marry someone I don\'t love. Now, if you want to keep the baby, I will support you and take responsibility for the child, but I will not... marry you."

He added, "And if my offer is not good enough for you, I can\'t force you to keep the child for me. I am not a heartless man who would force my will to a woman."

"But you forced yourself on me at that night!" Karenina snapped. "How dare you say you are not a heartless man?"

"I actually slowly remember the events from that night," Nicholas winced his brows in disgust. "I started having headache after I drank the wine you gave me. It was a long time ago and I don\'t have the evidence, but I can still do more investigation about the wine... and who knows what I will find."

Karenina\'s heart dropped to her stomach when she heard Nicholas\' words. Shit. Did the king really remember that he had some reactions after he took the wine from her? This was really bad.

If Nicholas had been suspicious of Karenina, he would probably make it his mission to investigate this matter more intensely if he was cornered. Forcing him for marriage like this was not a good idea.

He might already be suspicious of Karenina but he brushed it off because he felt guilty about sleeping with her.  But if she kept pestering him and didn\'t know when to stop, he would launch full investigation and who knows what he would find?

He might chase after the servant, Karenina\'s people, her father, and perhaps also Doctor Lehman who checked on Karenina\'s condition after she claimed she was raped.

p Nicholas would find a lot of evidence if he kept looking. This thought actually scared Karenina.

Damn!

\'I hate you, Nicholas Hannenbergh. I hate you so much.\'

\'I might have loved you in the past, but your vile treatment of me had opened my eyes.\'

\'You have taken years of my life. You made me believe that someday I will be your queen, only for you to toss me to the ground mercilessly, embarrassing me in the process and making me the laughingstock of the kingdom.\'

\'I hate you. I hate you so much. I will make you pay.\'

Karenina bit her lip so hard, it was bleeding, and she felt her body shaking with anger.

"G-give me time... t-to think..." she muttered almost inaudibly.

Karenina turned around and left the king\'s study with shaky steps. Nicholas almost felt sorry for her. He felt like a massive jerk. However, he couldn\'t find it in his heart to grant her wishes. He didn\'t want to ruin more people\'s lives with his indecisiveness.

If he relented and marry Karenina, she would finally realize that a loveless marriage was worse than hell. He would also resent her, and their child would feel all the pain.