Chapter 492 Chapter 112.2 - Don't see him within me
Since, in kindness, I was reminded of her.
In happiness, I was reminded of her….
In friendship and bonds, I was reminded of her….
Losing someone was not an easy thing; I knew that very well. For all that time, those memories had constantly haunted me.
That was why, to forget that, to forget my weakness, to forget how useless I was at that time, I devoted myself to my training.
No, being devoted was not the right choice of words. I got obsessed with training, and I still am. Since, when my mind is free, I could not help but remember how it was.
I still dream about those times….But, recently, it was a little different. The reason is evident. I finally came to accept that there were people surrounding me.
At the very least, some people showed concern. For a certain someone, we started on a bad footing, and for another certain someone, I received unrequited favors.
That person did not expect anything from me, yet helped me.
How did I repay?
I did my best, but at the same time, I was not honest.
Since I saw \'her\' in that certain person.
That was why, from the start, I knew there was something that had happened in Dakota\'s past. She had likely lost someone dear to her, and the pain of that loss still lingered just beneath the surface. I could see it in the way her expression had changed when I first revealed my [Weapon Master] occupation. It was just three weeks ago, during our first encounter.
I remember the way her eyes had flickered, a brief but unmistakable flash of something—pain, longing, maybe even regret. It was a subtle change, but being as observant as I am, I didn\'t miss it. Her body language told me what I needed to know. Her shoulders tensed, and for just a fraction of a second, she seemed to be somewhere else entirely, lost in a memory.
That fleeting moment was enough to reveal the truth. There was a story there, something buried deep in her past that she hadn\'t let go of. I didn\'t push her about it, of course. It wasn\'t my place, and we were just getting to know each other. But the signs were clear—she had lost someone, someone who might have shared the same path as me, someone who had been a [Weapon Master] as well.
As our training progressed, I kept those observations in mind. I saw how she pushed me, how she seemed almost desperate to mold me, to see me succeed. It was more than just a mentor guiding a disciple. It was as if she was trying to make up for something, to fill a void left by that person she lost.
And now, as she stood before me, her vulnerability laid bare; it all made sense. She wasn\'t seeing me for who I truly was. She was seeing the ghost of someone else, projecting her unresolved feelings onto me.
"Stop," I had said, not just for her sake but for mine as well.
I couldn\'t let her see that person in me, just as I couldn\'t keep seeing \'her\' in others. It wasn\'t fair to the person that was being projected.
Not only was it fair, but it was also disgusting. Now that I am in that same position, I can easily say that it is not a good feeling.
Dakota\'s eyes widened at my words, and I could see the realization dawning on her. She paused, the intense expression in her eyes softening as if she, too, was beginning to understand.
For a moment, the only sound was the gentle ripple of the water around us. Dakota\'s gaze dropped, and she took a step back as if the weight of my words had finally sunk in.
"You\'re right," she whispered, her voice barely audible. "I…. I am so-"
I shook my head slightly, not needing an apology. "There\'s nothing to apologize for. But whatever you\'re holding onto… it\'s time to let it go."
She nodded slowly, the sadness in her eyes giving way to a quiet acceptance. She was starting to see it, starting to understand that clinging to the past was not something that she should do.
But, well, it was not that easy to deal with things like these alone. I had noticed it myself after all this time.
You can even say it took me long enough.
I watched as Dakota\'s expression shifted, the realization of what she had been doing settling in. Her posture, once confident and commanding, now seemed smaller, more vulnerable. It was clear she was struggling to process everything that had just happened.
"You know," I began, keeping my tone gentle but direct, "maybe it would help if you found another way to release your pent-up desires. Especially considering how tense you look right now."
Dakota blinked, her brows furrowing slightly in confusion. "What do you mean?" she asked, her voice still soft, uncertain.
I didn\'t say anything at first, just let my eyes drop to her body—a subtle but clear enough indication of what I meant. Her gaze followed mine, and it was as if a light bulb went off in her head. A flush of red crept up her neck and cheeks as she quickly pushed her body back into the bath, the water splashing around her as she tried to hide herself.
She buried her face in her hands, clearly embarrassed by the realization of what she had been doing. "I… I didn\'t mean… I wasn\'t thinking," she stammered, her voice muffled by her hands.
I couldn\'t help but remember a certain girl who put up such a strong front but would embarrass herself instantly.
"It\'s fine. But yeah, it\'s a bit creepy, considering I\'m younger. A lot younger."
If I had not understood what kind of situation she was in and the amount of effort that she had spent for me, I would have cut her most likely.
But there is no need to have such thoughts for now.
Dakota groaned in embarrassment, sinking deeper into the water as if she could disappear entirely. "I can\'t believe I did that," she muttered, clearly reprimanding herself.
Seeing her like this was a strange contrast to the strong, composed figure she usually presented. It reminded me that even someone as tough as Dakota had her own vulnerabilities and moments of weakness.
"Hey," I said, my tone softer now, "we all have moments where we lose our heads. Don\'t beat yourself up over it."
Dakota lifted her head slightly, just enough to peek at me with one eye, still red-faced. "Yeah, well… still, I should\'ve known better."
"Maybe," I agreed. "But it happens. Just… try to find a healthier outlet next time."
"A better outlet?"
"Yes, a better one. With how you look, you can find it easily."
"That….."
It seems there really was a reason why she had invited me here. Looking at how she looked red, I could easily see that she indeed did not know the relationships between man and woman.
Dakota\'s face turned a deep shade of red as the realization hit her, her embarrassment only intensifying. She was clearly struggling to process everything, and her usual confident demeanor was nowhere to be found.
"You really didn\'t know, did you?" I asked, my tone both amused and a bit sympathetic.
She buried her face in her hands, clearly mortified. "I honestly didn\'t realize… I just thought…"
Dakota\'s eyes widened as she connected the dots, her earlier confusion now replaced with shock. "That\'s what you meant when you asked if it was okay… Oh, no wonder you looked at me like that!"
08:16
I couldn\'t help but chuckle, shaking my head slightly. "Next time you invite someone to your place for a bath, you might want to be a bit more careful. Most people would take it… differently."
Dakota\'s eyes widened as she connected the dots, her earlier confusion now replaced with shock. "That\'s what you meant when you asked if it was okay… Oh, no wonder you looked at me like that!"
I nodded. "Yeah. I figured you didn\'t mean anything by it, but still… you might want to be more mindful."
She groaned again, her face practically glowing with embarrassment. "I\'m such an idiot…"
"Not an idiot," I corrected. "Just… a bit naive about some things. But that\'s okay. We all have our blind spots."
Dakota slowly lowered her hands, her face still flushed but a bit calmer now. "I\'ve never been good with… this kind of stuff. Relationships, I mean. My life\'s been about training, missions, and duty. The rest… I guess I never really thought about it."
"Which is fine," I reassured her. "But just remember, not everyone you meet will be as understanding. You don\'t want to send the wrong signals."
She nodded, clearly taking my words to heart. "I\'ll be more careful from now on. Thanks, Astron. For… everything."
For some reason, I felt like the master and the disciple had changed at that moment, but well, that was fine.
RING!
And thankfully, just at that moment, the meal arrived, breaking this weird atmosphere.
*******
After the awkward moment with Dakota and the subsequent talk, I found myself with some free time. The weight of the past few weeks of training was still lingering on me, but it felt good to have made so much progress. Nôv(el)B\\\\jnn
Having completed my training in the Axe, Spear, and Greatsword, I couldn\'t say I had mastered these weapons, but I had definitely grasped the basics. I knew how to control my body to adapt to them, which was the most important part, especially with the Everchanging Glyph working to optimize my form for each weapon.
I leaned back in my room, scrolling through some magic-related documents on my device. My interest in magic had always been there, but it wasn\'t something I focused on as much as my combat skills. Now that I had a bit of time, it seemed like a good opportunity to broaden my understanding.
As I flipped through pages on various spells and their applications, a notification popped up on my screen. It was a message from Reina.
[Reina: Meet me in this place. We need to talk.]
The message was brief, and Reina\'s tone was serious, even through the text. I knew better than to ignore such a request.
Closing the documents, I stood up, stretching a bit to shake off the slight fatigue that was settling in.
Whatever Reina wanted to discuss, it was likely important.
I left my room and made my way toward the northern courtyard. The corridors were quiet, the usual hustle and bustle of the facility replaced by a more subdued atmosphere. Well, at this hour, most of the trainees were still in training. It was Sunday, but there were no moments to rest.
The place was a wide-open space, dimly lit by the ambient lights that lined the edges. Reina was already there, her posture relaxed but her gaze sharp as she watched me approach.
"You are here."
She said, looking at me. She looked like she came from outside.
"The things that you had requested are here."