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Chapter 123: Can't Experience Jealousy



After what Luc told me in the morning, I could not relax. First of all, I was worried about a lot of things. And then Luc dumped all those information on me at once. It was hard to take everything in. Besides, accepting the facts was even harder.

It was not like he did not have a point. I did not know my true father. But how could my father be a mage? If he was a mage, then it meant that he was a werewolf as well, even though he had fewer werewolf characteristics. But I heard that only Alphas or those with Alpha blood can enter another world.

"Dem, can... a mage enter... another world?"

"No," he replied bluntly. "Why are you asking this?"

"Just curious... I mean, t-they can... never?"

"Well, not the mages of the present time. But the previous mages, like a very very long time ago and only black mages," he said.

"Oh... Can a m-mage, I mean... a black mage l-live more than... No, what I m-mean is... How many years... can a m-mage live at m-most?" I asked.

"Just like us, normal werewolves or humans," he said. "But legends say that very powerful mages can live up to hundreds years."

"By p-powerful... you mean, the mages of a... long time ago?"

"Yes, they were very powerful. But don\'t believe in weird things. No matter how powerful a person is, how can they live that long?" he shrugged.

How could I tell him that after coming here and living with werewolves, seeing magic, meeting a real magician, hearing strange things, nothing felt impossible anymore?

"Did that punk give you weird ideas?" he asked, suddenly angry.

"Ah, no... H-He didn\'t... We were... just talking about... a lot of s-stuff since there was... nothing else to d-do," I said quickly.

"I don\'t trust that guy..."

\'Huh, that\'s a lie. If you didn\'t trust him, you would never leave him with me.\'

"But... you trust m-me, right?" I said. No matter what, he would never admit that he actually trusted Luc. Perhaps it was how friends were supposed to be. Never telling each other the true feelings, but still, being together. Since I never had any friends, I never knew about this feeling.

"Yes, but..."

"Don\'t... worry," I said and patted his head. He was lying on my chest again and rubbing my shoulder with his hand. It was how he always behaved after coming back from work. He said he was relieving stress this way. "So...

h-how did... it go?"

"It was alright. I provided them with some help," he said.

"Y-You look... disappointed about... something," I said.

After living with him, I could understand his expressions pretty clearly. Sometimes it felt like, I could read him well. But there were also times when he felt like a completely different person. I did not want to like him like that.

"That woman, the daughter of that noble family, she is ugly," he said directly.

"W-What... Why... are you saying i-it like... that? What if... it hurts her f-feelings?" I said as I slapped him on the shoulder.

"And besides, I... don\'t think so... at all. S-She is quite... beautiful."

"Nope, you\'re more beautiful," he said. "Compared to you, she is like a weed."

\'This guy... Is this how a doting husband supposed to be?\'

I could not agree with him at all. I had seen this woman\'s portrait. She had long silver hair and brown eyes. She was really beautiful, kind of like a fairy. And it was also me who chose this woman to send to Lacuna. But to Dem, she was like a weed.

I did not know if I was supposed to be happy or not that my husband only found me beautiful and did not even look at other women and also called them weed or annoying or disgusting.

"Well, it doesn\'t matter," he said. "As long as she manages to get married to the duke of Lacuna, it\'s alright. Though I am unsure if the duke would like her because of her appearance..."

"He will... like her," I said. I was sure about it since she was beautiful. It would be more surprising if the duke did not like her.

"I don\'t like her," he said. "I wouldn\'t choose her."

"Can you s-stop... it?"

"Are you jealous?"

\'Jealous, my ass! You\'re literally bad mouthing her and I am the one shielding her!\'

Besides, if a woman talked to him, he would just shout at her even though it was not needed. And if they somehow managed to touch him, he would literally burn them. Perhaps I would need to step up to save that woman. I had already known that jealousy was not something for me to experience in this life.

\'I pray for your safety, all the women that like my husband.\'

"By the way, does your body hurt very much?"

"Just... a bit," I said.

"Your \'just a bit\' means a lot," he said. "Last time you said this, I found you crying because of the pain."

"It... was just t-that t-time," I protested.

He sighed loudly. "I don\'t understand what those doctors are doing."

"They are... trying..."

"Trying, my ass! Obviously, they are not trying enough!"

"Don\'t... shout..."

"I\'m sorry," he said quickly and did not shout again. But the way he was fisting his hands, it was clear that he was fuming from the inside.

Dem had brought a lot of doctors within a week. But none of them could do anything. I did not blame them. It was clear that they were trying enough. But who could stop my husband? He kept blaming them and did not stop glaring at them.

He was actually the type to blame others even though it was not their fault. But I could not blame him for his behavior either. He must be too worried about me.

"You know, I saw a cat today with the same eyes like yours," he said.

"Is... that so?" I asked. "What... did you d-do then?"

"I chased it away."

"..."

"Deep inside the forest, so it doesn\'t come out," he said. "What if someone falls in love with its eyes? Then it would mean they would fall in love with you as well. I don\'t want that. Only I have the right."

"So... c-childish..."

"Yes, I am. So, keep me with you forever, and don\'t leave me," he said and pressed his head hard against my chest.

"I... I\'m not... l-leaving..."

"Yes, you can\'t," he muttered. "I love you a lot."

"M-Me too," I chuckled.

When he was alone with me, he was very childish. It was hard to believe how much he changed when he was with others. Even though I had seen it with my eyes many times, I still could not believe it fully.

"You sure you... don\'t have s-split... personality?"

"What? No. Why?"

\'Because of my daily life experience.\'

These days, I could not get up from the bed at all. Someone needed to take care of me all the time. Since I was the queen, a lot of maids could take care of me. But the thing was only two persons ever took care of me. One was Ruby and the other one was my sweet husband. It was not like I wanted more maids.

It was just, I did not know what to say when Dem would not let anyone near me and would take care of me all by himself. He gave me a bath and changed clothes for me. He even learned how to fix some of my dresses and how to make different hairstyles from Ruby. But he threatened her that if she told anyone about this, he would kill her. I told him it was unnecessary, but he did not listen.

"Want me to give you a massage?" he asked.

"No, I\'m... fine," I said. I did not want to stress him more. He was already doing more than enough. How could I ask him for more? Even though he was my husband, I could not help but feel guilty.

"You know you don\'t have to feel guilty," he muttered as if he could read my mind.

"I\'m not..."

"Let me give you a massage," he said as he got up.

"Wha... No... It\'s..."

"Don\'t talk," he said. He looked sad and angry at the same time. At these types of times, he was quite forceful. And when he looked at me like that, I could not help but get scared.

"O-Ok..."

His hands were expert as he started massaging my body. He pressed at the right places. It felt good, really good.

I felt drowsy. I felt guilty that I was using him.

"You can sleep if you want to. Actually, I suggest you do so. It will be good for your health," he said.

I closed my eyes. Sleep instantly pulled my consciousness and within a while, I was drifting of to a deep slumber.


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